Ack no I haven't given up! That is not in my nature.
The only reason I am concerned about the gaping is that it has gotten progressively worse since day one. I'll attach a horrible picture of it taken 12 hours after placement in my tank. I had just turned on one of the 10k bulbs. If you notice (it is hard to tell) the upper left side of the inhalant siphon is rolled back, missing if you will. Looks like something took a bite out of it. Nothing did that of course, it just has that appearance. Every day after that it would progress to the state in the picture yesterday. The progression is what concerns me.
Eh the picture won't post surprise surprise...
I think the shipping must have been rough. The box arrived in good order but I looked at it again two nights ago as I was putting it into my closet (I keep such things for several reasons) and noticed that the lid of the styrofoam was mashed in some. I am guessing they placed it upside down or jostled it around quite a bit during shipping. I know in the course of one night the package was loaded/unloaded some 4 or 5 times.
Parasites? I've counted 9 pryamidellid snails so far, and brushed those off with a toothbrush along with an orange mass on the bottom. I have stayed up two nights in a row watching for predation - none at all. Everything leaves it alone. It has two commensal shrimp living in it, but they don't bother it.
Water is fine and more importantly stable:
temp 79F, NH4 - 0, NO2 - .07 (bioload increase with addition of clam and six line probably caused a small spike, it is usually 0), NO3 - 1, Ca - 410-450, dKH 12.5-14 (hard to read colors), pH 8.15-8.2 night and day, PO4 - .13, SG 1.024.
Hmm from my understanding Peabody true gaping is anytime the clam cannot keep its inhalant siphon closed, prevent its syphonal mantle from stretching or effectively contract its adductor muscle.
Thanks for the replies and advice! I've asked all around concerning this. I find it better to get more than one opinion on any given subject, so if someone I've asked for advice privately or elsewhere reads this please do not take offense.