When family couldn't care less
- Thread starter Megatrev62
- Start date
lilalove
New member
Nobody in my family even looks at my tank. I still live at home, and occasionally my mom would give me a hard time over the cost of things. Hey, I wasn't behind in bills and rent, so what was the problem? One day I took her to the fish store with me, and she liked a particular fairy wrasse. I saw a way to get her off my back, and I let her buy it for me. She would come check out "her" fish every day. It died, but she'll still walk by and ask about new things in the tank. Her favorite is the tailspot blenny. I got him under an inch, and now he's 2.5 inches. She always says "He's gotten so big!" like a proud grandma.
Just yesterday, I re-did my aquascape. The water was all cloudy and mucked up. She came home and shouted "You aren't taking apart the tank, are you?!" Funny how that works.
On a different note, I did date one guy who wanted to really be involved in my fish tank duties. He never did anything the way I wanted it done, but I felt bad not including him. It didn't work out, but ever since that experience, I think I'd be happier if the next guy that came along wasn't interested in my hobby at all.
Just yesterday, I re-did my aquascape. The water was all cloudy and mucked up. She came home and shouted "You aren't taking apart the tank, are you?!" Funny how that works.
On a different note, I did date one guy who wanted to really be involved in my fish tank duties. He never did anything the way I wanted it done, but I felt bad not including him. It didn't work out, but ever since that experience, I think I'd be happier if the next guy that came along wasn't interested in my hobby at all.
Like i said 'ahem' me time!!! lol
Lynnmw1208
New member
heh my mom was the same way. She thought I was crazy drilling my tank and "wasting my time with something so pointless". After she saw it filled and the rocks in she claims it's now "beautiful". parents are funny sometimes. it's not her house anyway so she doesn't have to look at it every day lol
sczlars
Member
Post marital separation (I have my own space now), I started a tank around last newyears... involving the kids, so every time I see them they ask me "anything new in the aquarium??" Yesterday we bought the first fish for it, and we all agreed on the choice (fairy basslet). I love having the kids this involved, as they are learning all sorts of good biology and science stuff, and genuinely like it. The new GF is liking it a lot too, though the joke is that I'm becoming "Mr. Reef" or something like that.
Fun thread; I know about hobbies not being appreciated...
--Lars
Fun thread; I know about hobbies not being appreciated...
--Lars
Interesting thread. By that I mean I identify with it very much.
My GF was first very supportive of the tank with a measured distance (she never helps on the money end, but is very interested in stocking the thing). Then she started to give me attitude with the amount of time I was putting into the tank. I can understand that though, I really enjoy learning about and engaging this hobby so it has takes up a lot of my time.
I figure that whatever I can do to help her into my enjoyment of the reef is ultimately going to be better for both of us and so I try and let her pick out most of the inhabitants. I'm currently trying to get her to understand that we can get corals instead of fish,.. she doesn't get the coral thing.
To get her into the hobby I started by trying to tell her about all the filtration and the nitrogen cycle and I could see she almost entered a coma shortly into these conversations. I changed my approach and asked her to pick out some fish, then she showed a lot more interest. There is a lot of "no we can't have that fish" followed by the explanation why and then the envitable, "no, we just are not going to get that fish".
I've started to sculpt her choices with questions that she generally does a good job researching and I think we'll end up with a very nice tank.
She's told me i'm "obsessed" and other things, i'd have to agree with her. I'd really like if she'd help with some of the tank "upgrades", but I just don't think that is going to happen.
My GF was first very supportive of the tank with a measured distance (she never helps on the money end, but is very interested in stocking the thing). Then she started to give me attitude with the amount of time I was putting into the tank. I can understand that though, I really enjoy learning about and engaging this hobby so it has takes up a lot of my time.
I figure that whatever I can do to help her into my enjoyment of the reef is ultimately going to be better for both of us and so I try and let her pick out most of the inhabitants. I'm currently trying to get her to understand that we can get corals instead of fish,.. she doesn't get the coral thing.
To get her into the hobby I started by trying to tell her about all the filtration and the nitrogen cycle and I could see she almost entered a coma shortly into these conversations. I changed my approach and asked her to pick out some fish, then she showed a lot more interest. There is a lot of "no we can't have that fish" followed by the explanation why and then the envitable, "no, we just are not going to get that fish".
I've started to sculpt her choices with questions that she generally does a good job researching and I think we'll end up with a very nice tank.
She's told me i'm "obsessed" and other things, i'd have to agree with her. I'd really like if she'd help with some of the tank "upgrades", but I just don't think that is going to happen.
stingythingy45
New member
My wife likes the tank a lot,daughter isn't really into it.The inlaws and my family on the other hand don't really comment much.Her sister shows interest but nothing like folks that are really into this hobby.
I've had cable guys over my house freak when they seen the tank,one even had a tattoo of corals and fish.It's refreshing to meet folks that are into this.
I think the biggest let down is there's nobody at work that gives a rats * about the hobby or my tank.It's that old glazed over look if I even mention it(and it's not often).
So,I don't mention it anymore.But,it's a drag not to have somebody to talk with about the hobby at work.
I've had cable guys over my house freak when they seen the tank,one even had a tattoo of corals and fish.It's refreshing to meet folks that are into this.
I think the biggest let down is there's nobody at work that gives a rats * about the hobby or my tank.It's that old glazed over look if I even mention it(and it's not often).
So,I don't mention it anymore.But,it's a drag not to have somebody to talk with about the hobby at work.
lilalove
New member
I log on here from work all the time. (As a matter of fact, that's where I am now! Shhhh) One guy got all excited when he snuck up behind me and thought I was on a scuba diving forum. When I told him it was for SW aquariums, he said "Oh" and went on his merry way. Yes, I get that eyes glazed over look too, from practically everyone. One of the managers set up a small FW tank in his office, and asked me for help because he knew I was into fishkeeping. When I tried to explain that he needed to cycle the tank, and how the nitrogen cycle works, he looked at me blankly and asked "So when can I put in fish?" He didn't listen to me, and his tank has since crashed. Not that I'm happy about that but...
Megatrev62
New member
You always make sense.................
My wife loves the tank and doesn't care about the cost. She used to clean the glass until I got a Rabbit fish, now she is afraid to put her hand in the tank.
The only thing she says now is whatever I buy needs to be able to handle the large tank, so I'm not buying it again in 6 months.
I have to say I'm a lucky man to have an understanding wife, started with a 55 hex, then got another 55 for aggresive SW fish, then to a 90, explained I was getting a 200-300g when we moved, she was fine with that, so last week told her I was thinking about going to a 500g or so, floored me when she said "get what you want I know what it means to you". I'm not going that big .........well maybe.
On the parent/kid side, parents are floored when they come over, actually think I'm smart. My kids don't pay that much attention anymore, their to old and into the opposite sex too much. They do know the generator is for the tank not them though, they can build a fire.
Oh my ex, after 15yrs, she got too high and mighty for a tank, hence the ex part
The only thing she says now is whatever I buy needs to be able to handle the large tank, so I'm not buying it again in 6 months.
I have to say I'm a lucky man to have an understanding wife, started with a 55 hex, then got another 55 for aggresive SW fish, then to a 90, explained I was getting a 200-300g when we moved, she was fine with that, so last week told her I was thinking about going to a 500g or so, floored me when she said "get what you want I know what it means to you". I'm not going that big .........well maybe.
On the parent/kid side, parents are floored when they come over, actually think I'm smart. My kids don't pay that much attention anymore, their to old and into the opposite sex too much. They do know the generator is for the tank not them though, they can build a fire.
Oh my ex, after 15yrs, she got too high and mighty for a tank, hence the ex part
FishBo
New member
As long as she gets her "us" time she's all for it. I can tell she'll start getting a little irritated if I spend too much time on the tank. The one thing that really ****es her off and I'm sure I'm not the only one, is watching a movie. We'll be laying on the couch watching a flick and I'll sometimes pay more attention to the tank than what we're watching lol..
zigzag1
New member
I'm a lucky guy, no doubt about it. My wife shows interest, enjoys the tank, knows its importance to me, and leaves it to me to take care of, which I prefer. In a previous job that had me travelling frequently, she would help me care for it while I was out of town if needed. She knows the common name for all the inhabitants and often points out new growth, problems, or other observations. She has the best eye for design, so we always work together for those tasks. Her only reservations, which rarely occur, are about the investment/costs of some items. A shopping trip of her own usually makes things better! We make good living together, so it's never really been a problem.
She's definitely a keeper, really ~HOT~ too.
She's definitely a keeper, really ~HOT~ too.
zooxanth
New member
I am in the same boat, my friend.
I'm a lucky guy, no doubt about it. My wife shows interest, enjoys the tank, knows its importance to me, and leaves it to me to take care of, which I prefer.She knows the common name for all the inhabitants and often points out new growth, problems, or other observations. She has the best eye for design, so we always work together for those tasks. Her only reservations, which rarely occur, are about the investment/costs of some items. A shopping trip of her own usually makes things better! We make good living together, so it's never really been a problem.
She's definitely a keeper, really ~HOT~ too.
Our DT gets far more viewing than the tv
I'm a lucky guy, no doubt about it. My wife shows interest, enjoys the tank, knows its importance to me, and leaves it to me to take care of, which I prefer.She knows the common name for all the inhabitants and often points out new growth, problems, or other observations. She has the best eye for design, so we always work together for those tasks. Her only reservations, which rarely occur, are about the investment/costs of some items. A shopping trip of her own usually makes things better! We make good living together, so it's never really been a problem.
She's definitely a keeper, really ~HOT~ too.
Our DT gets far more viewing than the tv
