Since I fractured my shoulder last night..
The story goes:
3 1/2 years ago at my wedding, my friend Jeff (wifes best friend since Pre-K) and Malcolm (my now-ex-brother-in-law) decided it would be funny to throw me in Lake Hopatcong at the end of my wedding night. Ok, so it was June, and it wasn't too bad.. I vowed to get some payback.. 4 months after my wedding, I got pay back on Malcolm. His wedding wasn't near water, so I had kitchen help fill two 5g buckets with icewater. I took a walk with Malcolm to have a talk, bro-in-law to bro-in-law, and had two of his friends dump the 10g of ice water on him..
It took 3 1/2 years for Jeff to get married.. His wedding was saturday. I wanted to throw him in the lake, but with 20 degree temps, I wasnt gonna be responsible for sending him on his honeymoon with pnemonia.. I had to come up with a plan b.. Well, the wedding was 12-6pm, and we went back to the hotel.. Jeff was going back north at 9pm, as he had to catch a flight to St. Thomas at 7am this morning.. at 8:45 Jeff went to take his dog for a walk (cool hotel that allowed pets, much less Loki who is a pit bull).. I quickly put Plan B together. I gathered some people, grabbed all the empty hotel room trash cans we could find (2), and filled them with ice water. Ran downstairs to the door he would use to come back, and waited.. i had one can behind my legs when Jeff came back, and he asked what the hell I was doing outside. I said smoking a cig of course, what do you think (I needed him to get a little closer to soak him).. He takes 5 steps towards me, and I step to the side exposing the trash can. He asks me what the hell that was for, and why half the wedding party was just inside the glass doors.. d'oh! I quickly replied "For THIS!" and tossed the water on him, completely soaking him... His cousin was supposed to throw the 2nd can on him, but chickened out and handed it off to me. Now Jeff begins to run, Loki leading the way (some protection that dog was!, what a wussy!), and I started running after him.. Well my shoelace came undone, and I stepped on it running full speed and fell straight forward, my shoulder landing on the garbage pail.. I actually skipped, like a stone across a pond, when I fell..
Well, I got up, felt really sore, and thought I bruised or dislocated the shoulder, and couldnt lift my arm with my own muscles..I continued to party till midnight, and I guess the adrenaline / shock / beer kept it from hurting that bad.. at midnight the wife and I returned to our room, I took a hot bath and it got worse.. I laid down to sleep (figuring it would go away on its own) and couldn't get comfortable. at 1:30 am I got the chills really bad in a warm room while under the blankets, and realized this was shock setting in.. Woke the wife and had her take me to a hospital (luckily it was only about 15 mins from the hotel we were at).. signed in at 2:05, and left at 4:45am. I was the only normal patient.. The rest were drunk idiots.. Dr said its not dislocated,, but could be a torn rotator cuff, or a fracture.. After the x-ray we determined it to be a fracture, as my ball of my upper arm jammed into my shoulder socket, causing an impact fracture.. Basically I chipped a quarter sized piece of bone from the ball part of the bone, and thats where some tendons are attached (hence my inability to lift my arm)..
Well, the groom has no idea, he left for north jersey long before I felt any pain, but this morning his entire family looked at me lik a hero for pulling it off (getting my payback), and most were shocked that I had the immobilizer sling on since when we went to bed I was merely favoring the arm.. None of them knew we went to the hospital till after the fact..
was it worth it? HELL YEAH! 3 1/2 years waiting for this payback.. Sure, I'm banged up, but I got my revenge with the first bucket.
the grooms family is like a second family to me and my wife since my wife has been best friends with him fo over 20 years.. The sympathy I got this morning was overwhelming..
One of the ushers took a pic of me in the sling, and we're gonna do one of those mastercard ads with it..
$200 for a wedding gift
$125 a night for the room
$5 trash can
Fracturing your shoulder getting revenge on the groom: Priceless
We'll be sticking that to his front door with tape so he sees it first thing on returning home from his honeymoon..
The story goes:
3 1/2 years ago at my wedding, my friend Jeff (wifes best friend since Pre-K) and Malcolm (my now-ex-brother-in-law) decided it would be funny to throw me in Lake Hopatcong at the end of my wedding night. Ok, so it was June, and it wasn't too bad.. I vowed to get some payback.. 4 months after my wedding, I got pay back on Malcolm. His wedding wasn't near water, so I had kitchen help fill two 5g buckets with icewater. I took a walk with Malcolm to have a talk, bro-in-law to bro-in-law, and had two of his friends dump the 10g of ice water on him..
It took 3 1/2 years for Jeff to get married.. His wedding was saturday. I wanted to throw him in the lake, but with 20 degree temps, I wasnt gonna be responsible for sending him on his honeymoon with pnemonia.. I had to come up with a plan b.. Well, the wedding was 12-6pm, and we went back to the hotel.. Jeff was going back north at 9pm, as he had to catch a flight to St. Thomas at 7am this morning.. at 8:45 Jeff went to take his dog for a walk (cool hotel that allowed pets, much less Loki who is a pit bull).. I quickly put Plan B together. I gathered some people, grabbed all the empty hotel room trash cans we could find (2), and filled them with ice water. Ran downstairs to the door he would use to come back, and waited.. i had one can behind my legs when Jeff came back, and he asked what the hell I was doing outside. I said smoking a cig of course, what do you think (I needed him to get a little closer to soak him).. He takes 5 steps towards me, and I step to the side exposing the trash can. He asks me what the hell that was for, and why half the wedding party was just inside the glass doors.. d'oh! I quickly replied "For THIS!" and tossed the water on him, completely soaking him... His cousin was supposed to throw the 2nd can on him, but chickened out and handed it off to me. Now Jeff begins to run, Loki leading the way (some protection that dog was!, what a wussy!), and I started running after him.. Well my shoelace came undone, and I stepped on it running full speed and fell straight forward, my shoulder landing on the garbage pail.. I actually skipped, like a stone across a pond, when I fell..
Well, I got up, felt really sore, and thought I bruised or dislocated the shoulder, and couldnt lift my arm with my own muscles..I continued to party till midnight, and I guess the adrenaline / shock / beer kept it from hurting that bad.. at midnight the wife and I returned to our room, I took a hot bath and it got worse.. I laid down to sleep (figuring it would go away on its own) and couldn't get comfortable. at 1:30 am I got the chills really bad in a warm room while under the blankets, and realized this was shock setting in.. Woke the wife and had her take me to a hospital (luckily it was only about 15 mins from the hotel we were at).. signed in at 2:05, and left at 4:45am. I was the only normal patient.. The rest were drunk idiots.. Dr said its not dislocated,, but could be a torn rotator cuff, or a fracture.. After the x-ray we determined it to be a fracture, as my ball of my upper arm jammed into my shoulder socket, causing an impact fracture.. Basically I chipped a quarter sized piece of bone from the ball part of the bone, and thats where some tendons are attached (hence my inability to lift my arm)..
Well, the groom has no idea, he left for north jersey long before I felt any pain, but this morning his entire family looked at me lik a hero for pulling it off (getting my payback), and most were shocked that I had the immobilizer sling on since when we went to bed I was merely favoring the arm.. None of them knew we went to the hospital till after the fact..
was it worth it? HELL YEAH! 3 1/2 years waiting for this payback.. Sure, I'm banged up, but I got my revenge with the first bucket.
the grooms family is like a second family to me and my wife since my wife has been best friends with him fo over 20 years.. The sympathy I got this morning was overwhelming..
One of the ushers took a pic of me in the sling, and we're gonna do one of those mastercard ads with it..
$200 for a wedding gift
$125 a night for the room
$5 trash can
Fracturing your shoulder getting revenge on the groom: Priceless
We'll be sticking that to his front door with tape so he sees it first thing on returning home from his honeymoon..
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Look on the brite side, at least you did'nt spill a trash can full of RO water
