<I>"I have read differing opinions on how much flow to have through the sump."</I>
I may be wrong, however, unless you are also planning to have a refugium within the sump you do not need to be overly concerned about flow through the sump. If you are planning to keep some type of macroalgae and grow pods, then you want to slow the velocity of flow. Velocity and volume of turnover through your display should certainly be focused on.
<I>"drain is 1"</I>
I second <B>auto_loader's</B> comment. Your drain will handle about 600 gph of water volume.
<I>"my head height will be about 3 [feet]"</I>.
I have not seen how you are planning to design your returns, but with that height you are looking at about:
* 353 gph with a Mag5
* 507 gph with a Mag7
<I>"probably need to add a ballvalve to throttle it back a bit."</I>
I have zero experience with this, but I would not think that the ball valve approach, though viable, is not a good long term strategy. I would imagine that the continuous, increased back pressure may be detrimental to the pump. But I do not know how durable these things really are.
I have seen designs where people who needed to reduce flow volume into their display, used a PVC "Tee" that will allowed them to divert a portion of water flow back into the sump. Sounds like this may be more ideal; though a bit more tricky.
Perhaps, someone else here may be able to comment/speak about this from experience.