You're not alone OP. I've seen similar threads about people having similar issues PA on other forums.
After seeing several threads like this, I decided go to Miracles for a quote on the tank I want to have built this summer, largely because their reputation for quality and CS is exemplary. Every time I've seen someone have an issue with one of their tanks (even minor chips) after delivery, it's replaced ASAP at no charge with no questions asked. If I'm shelling out big bucks for a custom tank, I don't want to have to worry about getting the runaround if something goes wrong.
Trying to point fingers at the customer over something like this is penny-wise and pound-foolish. They also wouldn't have a leg to stand on in court. The Magnusson-Moss act is pretty clear when it comes to tie-ins. They are not allowed to give you zero warranty if you do not buy their stand (though they can give you an extended warranty if you do so), and the burden of proof falls on them to show that your stand caused the failure.