Howdy,
I have a few colorful SPS but mostly brown acros, so I'm closer in time to making some of the mistakes you are. I am certainly still making mistakes!
First, you don't have to have SPS, especially acros, to have a nice reef. I love them, they are a real challenge, and it forces you to raise your skills to a new level AND always pay attention to what you are doing.
There are caveats to all of this advice, but this is a good starting point IMO.
Acropora and other SPS like stable water parameters and can really do bad if parameters swing. Sometimes they can tolerate just one parameter swinging, and other times it will kill them. For example, if everything is rock solid and you have a significant KH spike the corals may not react, but if multiple parameters are swinging and KH spikes you may lose a lot of corals, especially acropora. So with that in mind ...
KH must stay fairly stable, as in say less than .5 KH a day. API kits aren't good enough to measure at this resolution, I like salifert test kits.
You should never do anything that will change parameters unless you are testing. NOPOX is great at dropping nitrates and to some extent phosphates but if you drop them too low or too fast you can do significant harm to acros and some other SPS. You will want a good phosphate and nitrate test kit, again I like salifert for both. If you have money to burn then the Hanna ULR Phosphate tester is a good one to have, but not required.
SPS, and Acropora especially, are rather ironic beasts. They demand good water quality but at the same time do much better with food in the water. Drive Nitrates and phosphates too low and you'll end up with pale corals, but an algae free tank. It seems a lot of folks have really good results keeping nitrates around 5 and phosphates around .05. I am still struggling mightily with this, but my target is ~5 nitrates because when I get them too low, and if I allow phosphates to rise, I run into STN (slow tissue necrosis) and RTN (rapid tissue necrosis) issues.
Feed heavily, export frantically. With a smaller tank it should be easy for you setup a system where you can do regular large water changes to export nutrients. Some of the best nanos I've seen feed an impossibly high volume of food and do regular large water changes, gravel vac during water changes, and skim heavily.
Good luck!