Marine Depot Shipment - LMAO

ctopal

New member
Have any of you read a shipping confirmation from Marine Depot? My husband and I were cracking up at this. I tell you what, it's good marketing, because I wanted to go buy something else to see if I get a different funny e-mail to read!

Your aquarium supplies have been carefully picked from Marine Depot's shelves like delicate berries and placed into a wicker basket lined with unicorn fur. With the grace of a ballerina, we tiptoed them to our packing station where Santa's Elves"”who work with us during their off-season"”prepared your order for shipment.

Your products were methodically placed in each box using techniques taught to us by a former Tetris World Champion. Using a pair of tweezers, we placed hundreds of packing peanuts one-by-one into every nook and cranny to ensure safe transport. We are proud to share with you that our packing peanuts are reusable, recyclable, biodegradable and made using 100% recycled content. They also do not trigger peanut allergies. Eat your heart out, Mr. Peanut.

Saying goodbye to such sought-after products is always gut-wrenching. That is why we offer employees unlimited handkerchiefs as a part of our generous benefits package. As your order was whisked away at light speed down our assembly line into the loving arms of the shipping courier, our warehouse elves, with tears in their eyes, joined hands and whispered, "Jábba sô kalîk qonay." We don't speak Elvish ourselves, but they tell us the rough translation is "May these supplies bring stability and success to the aquarium and its owner." Wow, we are getting a little choked up ourselves now. Thanks, elves.

As the delivery truck pulled away from our warehouse dock, a rare double rainbow appeared overhead. That's when we knew the products we had raised since they were mere hatchlings were on their way to a better home. Please take care of them and, we promise, they will take care of you.
 
It is funny, though none of that prevented my last MD shipment from being a frozen lump once it arrived on my front porch. that unicorn fur is waaay overrated.
 
There's an online company called Woot that does that with all it's product descriptions. Always worth a smile. Make sure you check Marine Depot on April Fool's Day. One year they had a baby whale for your aquarium. It was awesome!
 
Glass-holes.com some times has some funny comments on items too. They also send you free candy with every order. Nothing like opening your box & finding some good candy waiting for you!
 
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