Perhaps taking it in a different direction is an option until you get your nerve back (I too have gone through the burnout over the years)? Something easier for a while to allow you to enjoy having the tank. You could take out all the saltwater stuff and do a massive amano freshwater planted tank... you have all the right components for it. If you returned the skimmers, took out the rock and sand... shut off some of the flow pumps... you could keep the halides up top (maybe not need as many or go with a more 'day' spectrum though). Several components from reefkeeping are directly useful for such tanks... the lights, the flow, the CO2 regulator/system (directly injecting CO2 into the water rather than through a calcium reactor), as well as the R/O unit and pH probes. I dont know if its your thing, but they can be made VERY striking, and it would lower expenses ALOT.
http://www.hemmy.net/2007/08/06/aquarium-art-by-takashi-amano/
You could also keep the rock/sand, and do an african lake tanganyika setup (you would have to clean the rocks/dry them but african cichlids prefer hard water, and mequon well water is ideal for them (I had 2000-3000g of tanks in my mother's basement in Mequon at one time because every tanganyikan I had would breed ASAP on the hard wall water up there). I used to import direct from Africa for wild breeder stock... still have a couple friends who import still and I could hook you up with. The reason I mention it is because there is a Lake Tanganyika version of the Anthias genus... they are called featherfins. When I look at Anthias, I keep thinking about them actually because how similar they are. Benthachromis tricoti is the 'king':
http://cichlid-forum.com/profiles/species.php?id=2083
http://cichlid-forum.com/profiles/species.php?id=1963
Thats a species I used to breed... a 'sand sifter' much like a goby.
But I think you will find most species of Cyathopharynx/Opthalmotilapia to be very similar to Anthias:
http://cichlid-forum.com/profiles/category.php?cat=8
The 'rift lakes' are often described as the freshwater equal to reefs... the water is crystal clear, and it may not be 'salty', but its full of salts like calcium. The fish are the most stunning of all freshwater species. The only problem is getting your hands on many of the better species isn't something you can do at the local store. You have to find the breeders/importers... which, as it turns out, Milwaukee/Chicago have the largest concentration in the nation, and you can easily buy babies for a fraction of the cost of saltwater. The fish are as diverse as in a reef... there are 'shell dwellers', 'goby cichlids', 'rock dwellers', etc. They are all cichlids (freshwater relatives of damsels it turns out), but they have diversified to replicate many reef type fish. The tropheus are like saltwater tangs... right down to their shape, behavior, and color. The frontosas are much like saltwater Angelfish. The Synodontis catfish from that lake are even a blast to watch (and their breeding is very interesting... they are 'bandit breeders' that use cichlids to host their babies)
I hope someday to set up a tanganyikan tank or two again. The tank overall may not have the diversity or concentration of life that a reef has, but the fish... oh, the fish. The behaviors and brainpower that those fish have is amazing. No saltwater fish I have kept can match them. They interact/communicate, etc... even between species often times. They have social structures and 'personalities'. Most saltwater fish, having so much more space available, never develop such interactions... its either eat or run away when not doing a breeding ritual. The only fish that come close are the damsels, pseudochromis (which the african neolamprologins are a near match), and jawfish in saltwater.
Just an idea for something to check out. I dont know if its more of an 'all or nothing' issue for you, but even without a reef, you might find something else in the meantime to provide enjoyment w/o aggrivation until the day comes when you want to give it a go again. Or, keep the reef as it is, and just drop the temps to 70 and raise/breed cuttlefish. I hope to someday have a cuttle tank myself... those things are just so complex and amazing.
Im just thinking that taking that beast apart might be a chore that might be easier to just convert to a different type of tank until sometime in the future. That way you dont have to go through buying it all over again. In the meantime maybe hone your SPS skills on a smaller tank... like a 120 or something... not that I think your tank's demise was your own fault, but you know... you could figure out your own way to success and then apply it to something large.
Heck... you could keep sharks or something...