<a href=showthread.php?s=&postid=8571932#post8571932 target=_blank>Originally posted</a> by Nu2SW
I know this may sound weird but I agree with sherie and doug also.
Not wierd, I am often to sides of the coin on the same page.
I was try to convey that I was more on the middle ground and wanted to say that there would be times, when one as a parent would need to instill the will of the parent on the child and back up the statement "because I told you so"........
In my own crazy understanding and opinion, and to help clarify:
I believe respect is earned and a created ideal used as a chain of command in less evolved cultures. Often cruel and heartless, the pack mentality has one goal.....pack survival. Before one can have respect, listen,learn from elders, become socialized, and consequently brought into the pack that there will be a point when your authority will be challenged and you must prove yourself as parent/alpha. My opinion is that at a certain point in ones life, one does not have the capacity for the concept of respect. I believe that the nurturer model is based on that respect and requires it for success, (ie: we have all seen adults trying to rationalize with a screaming toddler and not getting anywhere at that moment), because of this dependency for respect for the philosophy to work, it fails during that time, but is the best mode of efficient socialization overall.
It is my theory that to correct this behavior, one must instill some kind of limit in the mind of the child, and fear is a pretty basic one that we learn fairly young. When a child becomes irrational and decides to act "deevlolved" by acting irrationaly, the parent would need to go to a more basic and extreme method of control by resorting to "dog mentality" and use the "whip" rather than the "carrot".
I think its better to be more versatile and have more tools in your tool box and know when to use them, because polarized viewpoints irk me, and few things in life are 100% one way or the other.