Fine woodworking community of America:
"You have a lot of options when building fine furniture."
"Oak, Mahogany, Maple, Ash, Walnut, Poplar, Birch, Teak, Cherry are all excellent choices."
Me from the back of the room:
"How about rough pine from the lumber store?"
Fine woodworking community of America:
"Ah... Yes, I suppose you can use that if needed."
"The good news is that although probably not the best choice for furniture grade wood, pine can be stained very nicely."
"Popular stain colors include versatile, warm browns like Walnut, Early American, and Chestnut, along with modern, rustic tones such as weathered gray and espresso."
"These stains will bring out the natural wood grain and be warm and inviting to look at."
Me from farther back of the room:
"How about just painting it flat black, coat after coat, until it looks like particle board from IKEA?"
Fine woodworking community of America:
"Who let this guy in here?"
"Security!"