My unorthodox quest for the pulsing Xenia

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Hey RC,
Since none of the conventional parameters have been found to cause pulsing Xenia's, I've decided to take this one into my own hands and look for some out of the box solutions.

This all started this morning when I found my Xenia frag on the sand bed, and my Xenia's went from slight Arrhythmia to flat line. While a step in the wrong direction, it's inspiring to know that my incompetence can produce some pretty drastic results.

Using my ignorance as strength, I'll run new and downright irresponsible experiments on my Xenia daily until it dies or starts pulsing like a champ.

Day one: Hot sauce
Procedure: dabbed one drop of hot sauce on my finger, rubbed into a smooth coat, and proceeded to rub the heads of the Xenia.
Observations: Heads were closed for an abnormal amount of time. After 20 minutes, the Xenia returned to normal and is not showing any signs of pulsing.
Conclusion: Xenia's are not a fan of hot sauce.
 
Day 2: Pre-workout

Theory: nothing gets me going like those sweet, sweet aminos

Procedure: coated middle finger and thumb with pre workout, applied to Xenia

Observations: Heads closed, then immediately opened with no effect. Looks like my Banggai cardinal got a little taste because he's looking pretty pumped
 
in 9 months my 1 tiny frag of pulsing xenia turning into over 2 square feet of pulsing trouble. i think only total darkness will sent it to its grave.

good luck
 
While I appreciate the scientific explanation, I'm going for an answer that can be used by the "lowest common denominator" of reefers, namely me.

Took a few days break from the lab, but I'm back at it.

Day: 5? -
Showing my deadbeat Xenia's a video of pulsing Xenia's
Theory: it works for clownfish?
Procedure: convinced myself that the Xenia could see the video against all odds
Observations: I look like an idiot
Conclusion: I'm an idiot
 
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