Physically what i know from experience and research, you cant....not physically atleast. some say that the male usually has the longer dorsal fin(if thats how you say it) like a banner. but mine right now doesnt have one and the female does because the male just released fry and i guess he is weak and his fins started to get chopped up so i know thats not really true. the other big thing is the "bulldog" jaw in the males. they tend to have a more distinctive square jaw, but when that happens its usually when the male is already carrying eggs in his mouth, because like i said, my male just released his batch and right now he doesnt have that square jaw look anymore, the male and female are barely distinguishable. hth, but i know it doesnt, lol.
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