Unfortunate end to my hobby

fishysteve

fishysteve

New member
This how my tank looked yesterday when I had to brake it down and sell everything to my LFS. My wife was nice enough to tell me she wants a divorce on our second anniversary yesterday. Hopefully it is just temporary and I'll be back in the hobby in a year or so.

smangos
 
That's too bad. Beatiful tank. You'll be back in it before long. I got out of it when my daughter was born to be able to help out more. I missed it greatly and got back in it after about 4 years. I've been back in it now for 6 years. I hope the hobby wasn't part of the marital strain. I know the money and time we spend on our hobby could be taxing in some situations. My wife knows this is my baby and I don't have any other hobbys to speak of so she is very understanding as long as I keep it real. Good luck man.
 
I just finalized my divorce in April. The in-between time when I knew I was getting a divorce to when it is actually finalized was the most stressful time in my life. I'm a tall thin guy and I lost 20 lbs throughout that time and truthfully, my ex and I got along pretty well!

Sorry about you getting out of the hobby, but at least it's only temporary.

Keep your head up, try not to internalize the issue and realize that some people are just not meant to be together. Also, don't rush out and try to find someone new just to be with someone. You'll know when the time is right. Good luck and keep your head up!
 
RobbyVonAwesome - I thought she could have waited one more day to tell me.

romanr - The tank wasn't part of the problem. But she said she doesn't know what was/is the problem. I thought everything was fine. We never even argue.

I'll never get married again. She wasted eight years of my life. We were supposed to go to Abaco in the Bahamas next week. Now I'm going by myself. Something like that movie "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" :rolleyes:
 
I have to say that was a low blow. Sorry to hear about it. Take the advise of your quote from Darwin. I am sure many of us here are divorced and have many stories and words of wisdom. It almost always works out for the better in the end. I am on my second marriage after a 15 year hiatus and I couldn't be happier. Although I was happy being on my own also.... ; )
BTW... beatiful tank you had. You can look forward to starting all over again in a little while. That's half the fun of this hobby!
 
Sorry to hear you are joining the ranks. I wish you all the luck threw it all !! I went through it last year. At least mine was fairly painless when it came to the process. We saved at least 20k by not using lawers and by being civil towards each other. Probably and mainly because we both started on the same page as far as the divorce bieng an answer to our problems. In the end it wound up only costing about $600 and five weeks of time, by filling out the paperwork on our own and two trips down to the court house, It is never a good thing to have to go through but if anyone has to go through it I hope its as easy as mine went. I was lucky my ex was civil as I was over our differences.

Good luck with your situation. I wish you the best!!!
 
I am saving the chiller, skimmer, lighting, and Tunzes so it shouldn't be too pricey to start back up.

One thing I made very clear was she isn't taking my dog. She agreed.

Thank you for the support everyone. I just didn't see this coming in a million years.
 
I know how you feel about the dog.
That was a hard part for me, loosing the dog sort of started our process of divorce. At least I didnt have to fight over custody. We lost our dog in October of 07 and that sort of started the whole avalanche. We finalized the divorce in March of 08.
 
You tank is/was beautiful! Good luck on everything! And hope you get back into the hobby ASAP. You have an awesome eye for aquascaping!
I bet you're going to miss that clam! What a beautiful clam.
 
Hang in there Steve, I thought it was wasted time & the end of the world too but after time it will be the BEST thing that ever happened!!

I think it's those crazy PA women, they just don't know what they want...lol...I used to live right near you in Collegeville.
 
I'll never get married again. She wasted eight years of my life. We were supposed to go to Abaco in the Bahamas next week. Now I'm going by myself. Something like that movie "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" :rolleyes:
Click to expand...

why get rid of the tank?

I thought the same thing, but now i am about to marry for the 2nd time to the most perfect women in the world.

Looking back on things, i wouldnt change anything if i could do it again.

Soon you'll find tons of single women that will make you forget all about the ex.

as others have said... civil = a few hundred $, not civil = a retainer and many, many thousands
 
When they say "dont know what the proplem is" usually means she is seeing someone else. but its not the end of the world chin up.


Plenty more fish in the sea so to speak....
 
Awww man, sorry to hear about your misfortune. I'm sure you'll be back into the hobby before you know it! :) Good luck with a clean and swift divorce though.
 
I haven't been going through a divorce but am breaking up with a woman I thought was "the one" after a year and a half and for me the best thing that I could possibly do for myself was to "keep really busy" so I wasn't thinking about it too much...being in the middle of building my new 75 gallon system has been the perfect remedy to keep my mind off things. 8 years is a long time...very sorry to hear about your situation.

I hope you can get back into the hobby as soon as possible and build and even better system than you had before...if thats possible...you tank is/was beautiful!
 
Rough stuff man, best of luck. But, good idea on keeping some key hardware. You'll be back soon enough, keep truckin'.
 
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