I wouldn't be too worried about being smacked by the little guy, most of the time when they see a huge hand comming down and lifting their home up they shoot out all over the place. If you do get hit, it's not going to take your hand clean off or anything. Always wash your hands throughly and dry them before and after taking the plunge into a tank, lots of nasties in there. In the unlikely event you get smacked and the dactyl breaks skin, immediately wash your hands with warm water and soap, alcohol the area, bandage, at the most check with your local doctor just in case. Keep the area clean, infection is the worst senario. You should be fine though. You could always get some of those arm-length aquarium gloves from online if you are really concerned.
They do capture and pull/swim their prey into the burrow. I've never seen any of my three eat out in the open. They can also move things bigger than themselves quite easily.
You can keep trying the bottle trap or try something else. I won't be offended if you decide not to use my advise, on the contrary, if you find a better way please post it here. It's not like time is against you, just keep watching your tank, maybe at night to. It will show itself eventually. Oh and they love meaty food, mine love mysid shrimp the most.