bstone,
A few points for you.....
Were I going to do what you are about to do, I would first do something with the concrete floor. You could quite possibly find that it will influence the temperature in your fish room as much ( if not more ) as any other factor.
I'm also assuming that the door into the fish room is located in the garage? If that is the case, that will be another source of undesirable air infiltration that wiill also influence the temperature of the room.
What I'm trying to get at is that it's tough enough to control room temperatures in a fish room when there are very few, if any, external sources of heat or cold but to try to control them with a slab of concrete that only partially contained in a treated space and an entry door that opens to the same could prove to be a frustrating experience that would best be avoided. Personally, I would put in a raised, insulated floor and use an exterrior rated door.
You aren't that far away from where I live so I'm sure that you have those 0 degree days in winter. Your main lights should be plenty duuring the day but I'm not so sure about your other light being all that's needed on those cold nights
I would also consider adding some type of auxillary heat source just in case your lights don't give enough heat during a long cold snap. Your main lights should be plenty during the day but I'm not so sure about your other lights being all that's needed on those cold nights and it doesn't hurt to have a backup system just in case.
Now, on to the particulars ..........
You are going to have a buttload ( a scientific heatng and coolng term that means A BUNCH

) of water contaned in a relatively small area. On top of that, you will be using lights that will create loads of heat so you are going to need to become very aggressive in your methods of controlling both the humdty AND the heat.
You will need to use both your window A/C and dehumidifiier. The vapor barrier you asked about should not be needed.
In addition to that, I would use some type of vent fan that is vented to the outside ( not the garage ) for use when the temperatures and humidity levels outdoors are acceptable enough as to allow for its use. You can't use them all of the time but when you can, using them instead of the A/C and/or dehumidifier can save you some good money; enough to pay for the vent many times over. Remember that if you add any kind of fan that vents air out of the house that you must have a way for outside air to come into the house.
I don't know whether you use gas or electric heating but most homes that use gas heat could stand some additional humidity in winter. I will assume that you have gas heat and with that in mind, there are a couple of ways for you to incorporate your fish room into your home heating and A/C system.
My preferred method would be to run some ducts ( supply AND return ) from your furnace unit located in the garage to the fish room. I would locate the return duct near the ceiling and the supply duct near the floor. If you connect the ducts to closeable registers, you can regulate just how much air goes through your heatng/cooling system and can also close them which would effectvely remove them from the system.
The second method would be to add some vents that penetrate the into the fish room from the wall that is common with your famly room. I would use at least a total of 4 closeable vents and would place 2 of them high up on the wall and the other 2 would be placed near the floor. Doing this will allow air to circulate from the fish room into the house both helping with temperatures and humidity and the best thing of all is that it would be strictly a passive system in that no fan would be requred to produce that circulation. With closeable vents the system could effectively be turned off and on simply by closng or opening the vents.
You might consider doing both of the methods mentioned above. I would do both as I would much rather have and not need than need and not have and now, while construction is going on, is the time to make changes.
Doing this will allow your home heating and cooling systems to help with the task of keeping the fish room environment within an acceptable range.
When it comes to very large tanks/water volumes and lots of MH lighting, much of the temperature and humidity control is a fly by the seat of your pants type of thing as every setup is unique and, as such, unpredictable. I would install as many contingencies as possible while constructing the fish room rather than go through the pain of tryng to add them after the tank is up and running. With serveral methods of control you will have the ability to "tune" the systems for optimal performance in every season.
Good luck!