local reefers club

Airtex

Airtex

New member
I am trying my best to get my wife interested in the hobby. Took her down to MACNA Sunday but it didn't work out for the best. So far my ideas have only made her disapproval worst. Is there a local club/org that we can join? (West Palm Bch Fl) I thought maybe that's a good idea ?? I guess if others told her how great it is she would believe it ?? I am just searching for recommendations.

6 years ago when I started building a "tank room" I think that she thought it was just a passing phase...now that the room has been complete for a while, it has a lot of "stuff" in it and needs a lot more "stuff".... I think her attitude has changed....

I really would really rather have a partner to share this room with...instead of what I am getting now...receipt audits.

Thanks
 
http://pbmas.org/ Awesome folks!

I have found that after 20 years of my wife not really getting into the reef hobby like I did, sometimes its best to not even try to force it. It will just make her resent it more.
 
Shoot Oceanlandlord a pm he will hook you up.....he is one of the nicest guys around......he will take care of you.....
 
I would also say don't force it. My wife did not want me to get a tank, but she has learned to accept it. I think she enjoys it to a small degree, and even likes to name the fishes. But its clear that I cannot count on her for anything tank related, and I am totally OK with that. I think its great to share common interests with our spouses, but its even better to have your own interests. Keeps you sane, LOL!
 
take her snorkeling I did that with my wife not only did he get her into the fish tankshe likes the experience so much she starts asking me the names of fish and if we have them here in our local fish stores
 
I am not forcing it....just trying to nurture it.. My wife is a little interested..however we had found no venue available to her that makes reefing fun to her and for both of us to meet others.. over the last 7 years I got my reef education through a lot of reading, listening to the nice people on RC that are willing to share their valuable knowledge and my own mistakes.

I got her involved in testing the water and she liked it! AND she has better eyes than me so she is valuable to the maintenance of the tanks. :-)

Didn't know about PBMAS..THANKS
 
knuckles55, we are both certified divers and snorkeling is how I hooked her on diving years ago...took her for a sunset snorkel cruise off Key West and she was hooked on diving !
 
Club meetings are smaller and better places for getting to know other reefer's on a more personal basis. It's a bit hard to do at something as large and hectic as MACNA. Heck, I had trouble getting together with people I've known for years but only see once every few years at such events. Never mind trying to get to know new people.
 
How often do you go diving, my wife and I both scuba also. Maybe the 4 of us could dive and talk about fish tanks ;)
 
DRThompson,
We have not been diving in a while....so it would be great to get out. We own a business and the last 5-6 years have been a real challenge and has taken most of our time...we are just starting to get enough time to do a few things. Would love to get wet...we used to dive Boynton quite often...always liked that drift dive...especially for bugs. Can ALWAYS talk about tanks.
Thanks
 
Hi,

I've found that this hobby, like most hobbies, requires - among other - time, money (depending on how complex your setup is and how rare your collection of livestock can be), dedication, passion and persistence... you can love it but you can't hate it (although, sometimes I do feel some frustration). In my case, my wife could care less if tomorrow I sell everything and get into another hobby... :lolspin:

She does not care for the hobby itself - she can't understand why we invest the $$$ we do :D - but she understands this is something I love and supports my "addiction". Early on, however, we did agree on a monthly budget I could spend without impacting our household finances. This prevents any arguments based on spend.

Since I started my 72g bow front I've noticed her, slowly, coming over to the hobby - still not really liking the fact that I spend time and money on this - but now enjoying and admiring how far the tank has evolved and grown. She helps me when I'm out of town, with feeding and topping off (yes, I don't have an automated top off system... :facepalm:). She even gives me a daily report when I'm away. :D

So, in the end, I see it just like the process of cycling your tank and adding whatever you fancy... time, persistence, patience are key. No rush, as long as you agree on some ground rules.

Maybe, you can have her get into a hobby she'd like to do - and show her your support. This may take her mind away from your hobby and stop "auditing" for the sake of it. ;)

Just my two cents.
 
Have you tried the "hey, it's better than alcohol and strip clubs!" line? Works like a charm. Unless of course you like those too. lol.

Just kidding, don't use that one.

Honestly though, while my wife doesn't LOVE the hobby, she does enjoy the tank as long as I keep it neat and clean. I always ask her what coral/fish she likes best but I don't get her involved in all the equipment and maintenance stuff. It would drive her nuts. So yeah, like others said, don't force it, but do let her take part in it, at least as much as she wants to.
 
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