My days of high end, high maintenance, are temporarily over. I can to that realization gradually, but a comment from a visitor made it sink in.
My 180 was really my crowning achievement. It wowed visitors, hobbiests, and even myself. Once it was gone, I tried to catch that lightning in a bottle, to no avail. Just don't have the time of resources. That frustration lead to neglect.
Anyway, my mother was here with a friend like a week ago. With sll the death and destruction going on, she said, MY GOSH its beautiful! Anyone "in the know" would realize it was like looking at an autopsy of a loved one. BUT, with that, I said enoughs enough. I need to scale back to suit my life. 99% of people would be just as amazed staring at pulsing Xenia (maybe even more so) than dead Stags.
So who do you do it for? Yourself? Others? Do you get caught up in collecting, and designer names? Been there, done that. I need easy. Lower maintenance right now. That will make me happy. Sure I won't get the attention my 180 used to get, but whatever. I'll never be as famous as Gary anyway....why try?