Nicole, you sound like Dr Laura.
Ugh, what a nasty thing to say to me.
If I had a nickel for every guy who had some story about his "psycho ex" and how she ruined his life... well, I'd have a couple of bucks at least.
Ironically, one of the guys who gave me that sob story (trying to pick me up) happened to be the ex of a very close friend, but he didn't know I knew her. He used to beat the snot out of her and I spent more than one evening with her in the ER; she finally kicked him out. I take the "psycho-ex" stories with a very large grain of salt.
On the other hand, I know a man who legitimate has a totally whacko ex-wife. I've known him since he met her... yeah, she's truly a psycho, no doubt about it. She even moved several states away -- with their son. Anyway, once he got around to accepting that she and her actions were totally irrelevant to his actions and how he undertook his responsibilities, he, she and the child became much happier and reached an arrangement that worked for them.
My point is that there are always two sides of the story. Only knowing one, we can only offer suggestions for salt e to modify those things he admits he is or has been doing wrong.
Court will be painful and expensive. While you are deciding what to do, salt e, I recommend opening a separate bank account and begin regularly depositing the child support you have offered, but she won't take. Do not use the account for anything else. Make regular and timely deposits in the same amount, and do not withdraw anything from the account no matter what.
That one action will go a long way to proving your honorable intentions should the situation go to court.
you are right Nicole...there are 2 sides to every story...the reason we had a hard time staying together is cause i had issues with being monogamous when i was younger and didn't value relationships as i have grown to respect and enjoy now... even though i feel i had a right to do the things i have done...no-one deserves a cheating spouse... even if she did do it first...sadly enough, the error of my ways turn to haunt me... 
