Our significant others and our reef tanks

Single now, but if i work on my tank to much or sit around in the bacement watching things, my dog will come bump me and tell me to pay attention to him. My last GF would always complain about it, and anytime i wanted to goto a reef store she would make it misserable, then drag me to a art exibit. Either i need to find a reefchick, or one that agrees to do a little of what i want to do in exchange to do somthing she wants. Kinda diggin the single life though :)
 
for me it has been all good, my GF likes the fish and corals, she has actually learned all the names of different equipments and fish and different corals ... but yea she is just a gf for now !
 
My wife grudgingly gave in - I didn't tell her what it took to set it up and she didn't ask, the only deal was that she gets most of my paycheck for household expenses and I have my leftovers, which she has no problem me spending however I please. I did, however, need a bump from "our" account for my RODI and as long as it's not going to be expensive long term (like running up the monthly power bill) she's good with it. She won't admit it but I think she admires what I'm doing.

And she's getting used to the gentle waterfall :)
 
HumbleFish said:
My wife has a love/hate relationship with my involvement in this hobby. She loves looking at the tanks, and has even named all of my fish. She likes telling me where I should move a rock to, will sometimes want me to buy a certain fish/coral (usually not compatible :headwalls:) when we go to a LFS, etc. etc.

But she doesn't like all the time I spend working on my tanks or posting on here. She would rather I worship the ground she walks on 24/7. ;)
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Haha wow pretty much summed up my senario lol now my wife wants to stay home and sell frags since she is there for our 7 month old all day...she said if we can sell frags and make our money back then it will be worth it lol...I told her it will take a while haha
 
I had reef tanks for about 12 years when I met my husband. I had to take them down when we got together to turn my den/tank room into a bedroom for my two stepsons. I never complained. After a few years I mentioned wanting a tank again. It is a big stress reliever for me and I had a lot of stress at the time. Oldest son in Afghanistan and so on.
I started with the 29 out of my attic, within a week I bought a 55 instead. ;0)
At first he hated it...complained about the time I spent on it, the money and so on. It was very frustrating!
I decided to involve him and our boys in the whole tank process. Picking things out, buying, feeding, cleaning and it got better.
He bought me a 90 for Christmas...custom built all my stands..shows everyone pictures and doesn't complain at all now.
Whew....life is GREAT!
 
My girlfriend goes to the lfs for supplies with me and sits and we watch the tank together. She is learning and asks a lot of questions. When she is gone she asks for pictures of her favorite fish in the tank (the bicolor blenny). I am lucky to have a girl so doesn't get mad about my money spending on my tank.
 
My boyfriend and I are each into our own hobbies so it works out well. Neither of us feel neglected because we are busy with what we enjoy. Then when we hang out we ask each other how its going. He even goes by the tank sometimes to check it out and let me know if something looks off. Mostly I think he's delighted to have a girlfriend who doesn't constantly demand attention. I'm sure delighted to have a boyfriend who doesn't follow me around nagging for attention. It must be hard dealing with a significant other who makes you feel guilty for spending time on the tank. That really sucks.
 
My gf doesn't have an issue even with 6 tanks, but she likes to read a lot so usually when I'm working on the tank, she will be reading. If you are a life time reefer though, you either A, have to get your S/O involved in the tank too
B, get them a hobby so they do that while you work on tank or
C, keep the tank and not the s/o

Out of those, clearly A is the best option. Some people will just never care about certain things no matter how much you'd like them too. I also fly R/C helicopters which are quite pricey. She had never complained about it, but I started taking her with me whenever I'd go fly one and it started to grow on her. Watching them at least. I can definitely see the other side though, if you spend your whole day at work, then 5 hours on the tank, then 20 mins with your g/f and its an everyday thing, you may as well not even have the g/f.
 
stingeragent said:
My gf doesn't have an issue even with 6 tanks, but she likes to read a lot so usually when I'm working on the tank, she will be reading. If you are a life time reefer though, you either A, have to get your S/O involved in the tank too
B, get them a hobby so they do that while you work on tank or
C, keep the tank and not the s/o

Out of those, clearly A is the best option. Some people will just never care about certain things no matter how much you'd like them too. I also fly R/C helicopters which are quite pricey. She had never complained about it, but I started taking her with me whenever I'd go fly one and it started to grow on her. Watching them at least. I can definitely see the other side though, if you spend your whole day at work, then 5 hours on the tank, then 20 mins with your g/f and its an everyday thing, you may as well not even have the g/f.
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But she scratches my back! Jk. I love her to death. I'm working on getting her more involved. Also I spent an average of 4 hours with her in the evenings. About 3 on tank stuff. I've always got something going on. I'm not satisfied yet. Are we ever?
 
b_evans06 said:
My girlfriend goes to the lfs for supplies with me and sits and we watch the tank together. She is learning and asks a lot of questions. When she is gone she asks for pictures of her favorite fish in the tank (the bicolor blenny). I am lucky to have a girl so doesn't get mad about my money spending on my tank.
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My girlfriend doesn't like going into the LFS anymore. The last few times we were in there forever. She reads in the car now. Lol

She still asks me about the tank sometimes. She also stops by it sometimes and peers into it. I think she secretly likes it. She calls the corals by their colors though. No interest in names.

She does like the fish. Of course we have the standard "Nemo" and a selection of other fish names that she came up with.
 
Been with the gf for almost two years now. I had tanks before her and still do. I am finishing up my business program and moving onto my bachelors. I told her I want to downgrade in size or completley sell off the tank so I can focus better. She ripped me a new one because she met me with fish tanks and has always known I love my Reef tank. She told me she wouldn't know what I would do without some sort of filter to mess with or aquaria subject to talk about. Honestly, it's your hobby and no one should make you change your mind about what you like.
 
Paul B said:
I had tanks before my wife was born.
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Me too! Ha Ha, love it Paul.
My wife enjoys the tank, is getting into the 220g a little bit more now that I have the lights hung and rock and water in it. As long as I don't complain about her buying her things (paints and such for art/craft projects) and the kids are fed it is all good. She loved our Mimic Blenny from or last tank and now wants another and is asking about the wrasses and tangs I will get.
 
I always say make sure your significant other is reef safe!
My Gf is awesome, helps me, supports what I enjoy,and we by far stare at my tank more than TV(And she's hot!lol)
 
We both love the hobby, me more than him. I heard of a 180gl reef tank going to be taken down so I wanted it to have more room for my FW Jag and Green Terror to keep them from fighting. He saw how beautiful it was with coral and fish ...so.... COMPROMISE: He bought me two nineties, and bought the whole 180 out right.
He gets a compatible fish, I get coral, vice versa.
He buys games, I by corals. We both have our duties in the tank. I take care of fish/coral ect. He takes care of the electronics and skimmer. We team up for water changes and tank maintenance. He has his fav fish and coral, and they're all my fav, well the Scooter Blenny beats them all (;.... If a fish or coral dies, he takes me to get a new one because he knows how much time and effort "we" put into it.

He spends hours playing games, I spend hours on the tank...easily done BTW. We have four tanks in the house and every other weekend it's "TANK TIME" !

As for kids we don't have any, I did make the remark as to "What if" one day while it took us the whole day cleaning the tanks..he says..."We'll get a nanny "...Lol'
 
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davocean said:
I always say make sure your significant other is reef safe!
My Gf is awesome, helps me, supports what I enjoy,and we by far stare at my tank more than TV(And she's hot!lol)
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Haha. Nice.

Mine is hot too! That's why I need to pay her enough attention to keep her! :) She's borderline reef safe at the moment.
 
it is a good excuse not to be forced to watch tv shows with my wife... that being said she sometimes hates the time I spend on it.

worst thing though is taking her to an LFS because I end up buying stuff just to have my piece and my corals end up suffering ...:o
 
supervdl said:
it is a good excuse not to be forced to watch tv shows with my wife... that being said she sometimes hates the time I spend on it.

worst thing though is taking her to an LFS because I end up buying stuff just to have my piece and my corals end up suffering ...:o
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I hear you. Like the Sea Hare she made me buy. She suggested it but if I hadn't she would have been mad.
It was like a bull in a China shop in my tank. Corals knocked over every day. It couldn't have died quick enough for me. I then told her no more Hares. She acted mad but got over it quick. One thing I did was started adding more green to the tank. Her favorite color is green. It also looks best under blue lights. So win win.
 
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